Splatoon 2's redundant battle of Fork vs Spoon begins tonight

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Cutlery Conundrum

Tonight, the North American Splatoon 2 community will lock-and-load their respective ink-shooters and sally forth into battle over one of the most God-awful splatfest topics of all-time: Do you prefer a Fork or a Spoon?

Clearly decided five minutes before hometime on deadline day, the new battle seems Pearl going Team Fork, while Marina, lacking in all social graces, is going Team Spoon… How many more words do I have to write before I’m comfortable that I can call this article closed? To be fair, the comments for this splatfest’s announcement introduced me to people who use a spoon to eat rice dishes, so I guess they need correcting, at the very least.

The splatfest begins tonight at 22:00 PT / 01:00 ET and runs until the same time tomorrow night, by which point we’ll know which eating utensil is… the best? the coolest? the most useful regardless of the fact that utensils are designed for different purposes dependent on the food being eaten? Either way, it’ll be over, and we can get back to more important topics, like toilet roll orientation.

Splatoon 2 is available now on Nintendo Switch.

Also, check out this great art, it looks to me like Pearl is getting ready to play some Fork-knight. BECAUSE FORK-KNIGHT SOUNDS A BIT LIKE FORTNITE. THAT’S CURRENT RIGHT NOW. FORK-KNIGHT.